Sho Madjozi discusses motherhood and 'choice mom' journey on Nandi Madida's podcast

Musician and author Sho Madjozi recently visited Nandi Madida's "The Motherhood Network" podcast to open up about fame, identity and being misunderstood in the global music industry.

From her Tsonga roots to writing her next book, she reflected on what it means to stay grounded, creative, and true to herself while the world is watching.

A part of the conversation explored her motherhood journey.

During the conversation, the "Huku" hitmaker explained that in 2023, she felt a strong pull towards motherhood.

Upon visiting her traditional healer, she was told that a child had already chosen her. 

The "John Cena" singer said that she was not dating at the time, but she knew this was meant to be.

She told Madida that she is a "choice mom", which left even Madida curious. 

"Please tell us what is a choice mom," asked Madida.

Madjozi explained: "A choice mom means that I chose to be a mom. It wasn't that, 'Oh, okay, I was married and because of my marriage I had a child. It wasn't that I chose a man and the child was an aftereffect, no, no, no. I chose to be a mom. That's what we are as choice women.

She continued: "I am a huge supporter of single mothers and empowering them; however, being a choice mom is different to being a single mother.

"There are certain struggles that are not seen within the single mom world. They deal a lot with recovery and repair from the baby daddy and the conflict that comes from breaking up...

"There is a grief that I have held some of my friends through; I don't share that grief. I did not choose a man, I chose a child. I wanted to have a child. I was not interested in having a relationship.

"I have the privilege of not needing a relationship or a man. Our grandmothers did not have that privilege. I have it and I intend to use it," said Madjozi.

As the conversation deepened, Madjozi addressed a concern that many women in her circles have - the difficulty in finding suitable partners.

"In South Africa, I am not sure what is happening. I need people who are studying this to let us know. It seems to me, within my circles, that there are simply not enough viable men for us. I can name 20 or 30 brilliant black women who are smart, funny, educated, and they are everything, but it's not easy to find a partner. 

"I want those people to know that you have an option. It doesn't mean that because you can't find a man, or because men in your life, for those who have experienced men not being kind to them or not being good, now that is going to determine whether or not you want to have a child."

Madjozi encouraged women who feel unsure about finding a partner not to let that hinder their dreams of motherhood.

"If you want a child, you want a child. It should have nothing to do with whether or not you can find a partner. I see that as being two totally different things. What I might like for myself and what might make me excited down there, it's not the same thing that's good for my son. 

"I don't want necessarily for my child to be subjected to my romantic whims ... There is nothing that says because someone is sexy and attractive to me, that they would be a good father. There is no correlation, whereas I have good friends who would make great fathers. 

"So you can do it that way, have a known donor, there are also going to fertility clinics ... I would much rather parent alone, than parent with the wrong person.

"It is such a fear of mine, to the point that it was my preference. Now I can date freely, I feel that I am dating without that pressure, and I can raise my child the way I want to raise him."

Madjozi shared that she has a known father for her child, who has been very supportive and understanding about their arrangement.

"The father of my child is known to me, and he is turning out to be great at this ... Instead of shying away and feeling that people are not going to understand this, I did it that way and now I got, and everyone's journey will be different, but I got a father for my child, who is so kind, who gives me the space, we have a great understanding, he is fantastic and we are having the best time.

"He is very emotionally intelligent, and if I want to settle down one day, he could be an option. We will see how things go, but I love the freedom that I have."

With her empowering message, Madjozi hopes to inspire others to explore alternative paths to parenthood that work for them. 

"I am the biggest fan of families who are doing things in a way that is healthy and makes sense."

Watch the full podcast below.