Coping with the pressure of matric results: a guide for pupils and parents
AS THE much-anticipated release of matric results approaches, pupils, parents, and teachers alike feel a rising sense of pressure and anxiety. For pupils, this moment represents the culmination of 12 years of schooling filled with hard work, sacrifices and hopes for a bright future. But for many matriculants, it can also bring about stress, fear of failure and uncertainty about what lies ahead.
This emotional rollercoaster affects not only pupils but also their parents, who often experience the weight of expectations and the desire to protect their children from disappointment.
As a wellness counsellor, I have seen first-hand how the release of the matric results can trigger a range of emotional reactions. In this column, I explore how both pupils and parents can manage the stress and pressure that often accompanies this time and emerge from it with resilience and strength.
Understanding the emotional impact
For all matric pupils, results day is a defining moment. Whether they expect to pass with flying colours or fear they may not have done as well as they hoped, emotions are at an all time high. Common feelings include:
- Fear and anxiety: the fear of disappointing family members or not meeting personal expectations can weigh heavily on a pupil’s mental health. Anxiety about what the future holds without a university or career plan can also be overwhelming.
- Relief and joy: on the other hand, those who have worked consistently hard and feel confident about their results may experience intense joy and relief when their hard work is acknowledged.
- Shame or disappointment: for some matric pupils, the results may not reflect the effort they put in, leading to feelings of shame, guilt, and a sense of failure. This can be particularly difficult for pupils who have already struggled with personal or academic challenges.
Parents can also feel the strain. They may worry about their child’s future, feel guilty about their own role in the results with regards to their parental support, or be anxious about their child’s emotional well-being. It is important to remember that both pupils and parents are in this together and empathy and support can make a significant difference in how everyone copes with the outcome.
Practical steps for pupils
– Manage expectations: while it’s normal to want to do well, it’s important to understand that not all pupils will achieve perfect results, and that’s okay. Your worth is not determined by a single exam. If the results are disappointing, it’s just one chapter in a much bigger story.
– Focus on the next step: if your results are not as expected, there are still options available, such as supplementary exams, bridging courses or exploring other career paths. It’s essential to have a backup plan and to remain open to various opportunities.
Talk about your feelings: bottling up your emotions can make the situation worse. Whether you are feeling stressed, anxious or relieved, talking to someone you trust whether a parent, educator or friend can be cathartic. Sharing your feelings helps you process them and gain perspective.
Self-care is essential: prioritise your mental health in the days leading up to and following the release of your results. Engage in activities that relax and rejuvenate you, whether it’s exercise, meditation, reading or simply taking a walk. Mental and physical health are closely linked and maintaining a balance during this time is vital.
Practical steps for parents
– Be Supportive and non-judgemental: the best thing you can do as a parent is to provide unconditional support, regardless of the results. If your child achieves the desired marks, celebrate with them; if not, reassure them that they are still loved and capable. Your reaction can significantly affect how your child processes the results.
– Listen, don’t lecture: In times of stress, what your child needs most is to be heard. Avoid immediately jumping into problem-solving mode or offering unsolicited advice. Instead, let them express their feelings and validate their emotions. This shows empathy and helps them feel understood.
– Avoid overloading with pressure: while it’s natural to want the best for your child, avoid placing unrealistic expectations on them. Remind your child that life offers many paths to success and that failing to meet one benchmark does not mean failure in life.
- Encourage perspective: whether the results are good or bad, it’s crucial to help your child see that their academic performance is just one aspect of who they are. Success is a long journey with many avenues to explore and resilience in the face of setbacks is often the key to lasting success.
Looking ahead
The release of matric results is undoubtedly a stressful time, but it also serves as an opportunity for growth, reflection and personal development. Pupils who are able to navigate this period with emotional support, self-compassion and perspective will be better equipped to handle future challenges. Similarly, parents who provide understanding and encouragement create an environment where their child feel safe to face both successes and setbacks with confidence.
As a society, it is essential that we shift the narrative from viewing the matric results as a final measure of success to seeing them as a stepping stone in a much larger journey. In the end, what matters most is not the result of a single exam but the ability to bounce back, adapt and continue moving forward with hope and determination.
Hasinah Razak as an ASCHP registered wellness counsellor. She specialises in providing a safe, empathetic, and non judgmental space for clients to explore their thoughts, feelings and behaviours. Find her on Instagram: Renewed_focustherapy; WhatsApp 083 783 8240; email: Hasinahrazak@gmail.com; or see Linkedin: Hasinah Razak/Renewed_Focustherapy